Why it’s so important to have a positive perspective on life

We all have those days when we can be grouchy and fed up, we sulk and feel sorry for ourselves. That’s absolutely fine, you are entitled to feel like that, but make sure you keep that feeling short. For many years I placed my happiness in other people, I felt my most confident when people gave me compliments, and if they didn’t, that must have meant I looked awful that day. It was a destructive mindset and it meant that if whoever I was surrounded by had a bad day, so did I.

I have come to realise over the last couple of years that the only person that can make decisions on your happiness is you. The best way for you to enjoy every day is by making sure you always come back into a positive frame of mind. You will soon start to push back on any negativity that comes your way, and begin to feel more confident in yourself than ever before.

We should never forget everything what we have to be grateful for. One of my best tips to a positive start of the day - when you wake up, lay in bed for 5 minutes and think about all of the things you are excited about in that day to come. Similarly, another good tip is to think about everything you were grateful for in the day you have just had. Did someone make you a really good cup of tea that made you ‘ooh’ at your first sip? Did someone hold a door open for you, or ask how your weekend was? Try to think of the little things, they are the moments that add up to a special day.

“You can tell who the strong women are - they are the ones building each other up, instead of tearing each other down” - Mel Wells The Godess Revolution

I know it’s easier said than done and the pressures of social media make it even harder these days. We are so consumed by the digital networks and it is without doubt having an impact on both our self-confidence and life perspective. Yes it is creatively inspiring and more than interesting to constantly look through glamorous Instagram profiles, but please remember a social media feed does not reflect someone’s happiness, fulfilment or self-worth. They are snapshots of the best parts of a person, totally filtering out what goes on behind the scenes. Nobody has a perfect life.

Having a negative mindset alongside the social media obsession can lead us in to a trap of being constantly unsatisfied with what we have, along with being more and more critical of other people. We judge and we live in fear of being judged. People who post out of insecurity are often looking for acceptance, yet we are quick to judge them for being vein. Some people may post because they are proud of their achievements, yet some may see this as self-obsession or showing off.

I understand that these thoughts may not apply to every situation, but if you can change your outlook on the world, you will change the way you view other people. Put on those rose-tinted glasses and you will be much happier in yourself.

“A million likes will never be enough if you don’t like yourself” - Kayla Itsines

Another important topic that gets buried down deep never to be spoken about unless it’s with your inner critic, is insecurities. A word that gets thrown around in such a bad light, but we all have them, we just need to control/own them. Drowning your thoughts with your insecurities can be really damaging to your life perspective. It is definitely a sensitive topic and I’m not expecting anyone to tackle it, but what I would love to do is help people think differently about them. It works in three ways. How you see yourself, how others see themselves and how you see others can make or break relationships.

Firstly, your own insecurities eat away at you, you compare yourself to other people and as a result, we often become jealous or envious. When you have these negative feelings, not only are you decreasing your own self-worth, you start to believe it and others might start to believe it too. More importantly, you’re probably not very good to be around, and nobody wants that.

Secondly, when other people have a lot of insecurities, you can often find yourself on the receiving end of this which is incredibly influential. Your own mindset and mood can be impacted by other people without you even realising, so it is important you are conscious of how you are able to stay positive around negativity. Having a positive outlook will allow you to forgive those with insecurities who act negatively towards you, you could maybe even help them overcome their negative thoughts. What an amazing friendship that would be.

Thirdly, stop having a fear of being judged. If you do, your insecurities will become much less significant in your life and you will start to focus on the good. Being judged makes us apprehensive about doing the things we want to do, but as soon as you stop judging yourself you won’t think twice about people judging you, or if you do, you won’t care.

“Only ever choose to spend time in the company of people who make you feel good about yourself” - Barry McElduff

One final thing I want to talk about is comparison. We need to stop comparing ourselves to other people, we are all beautiful and cool in our own way. Make sure you spend time with people who make you feel your absolute best, who you don’t even think twice about comparing yourself to. A positive mind set sparkles when you choose to spend time with people that make you feel good about yourself.

When you think positive, you feel positive. When you feel positive, you act positive. When you act positive, great things happen and good people gravitate towards you. The positivity you give out will come straight back at you.

It’s all about perspective. Make it positive.

Charlie Farlie x